Tag: Truth

Self Care

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Self Care

January 3, 2020

REA/L Moment: yesterday was a migraine day. Woke up, holding my head, feeling awful, only to throw the sheets back, run to the bathroom, and proceeded to uncontrollably heave repeatedly into the toilet. Spent the rest of the day fighting waves of nausea, a pounding head, and supreme guilt that I simply wasn’t living up to my “mom duties” for the day.

Flash forward to this morning. Woke up exhausted, having only gotten a few hours of sleep (again), but functioning. Completed morning “mom duties,” returned home, and faced a decision. Should I lay my tired body back down, hopefully getting some additional sleep, or should I just suck it up and start knocking things off my list? The decision came easily, and remarkably, shame-free: I slept.

And that, my friends, is self care. I wanted to feel good today instead of having another set back, so I did the smart thing and took care of myself. Our current culture may shout “self care,” but in the same breath, shamefully look down their noses at us with distain for such an act of “laziness.” Not only is this added “guilt” associated with self care unhelpful, it’s all together unhealthy!

So in my REA/L moment with you today, consider this: on multiple occasions Jesus, withdrew, and went off by Himself to pray, to rest, to recharge so He could continue doing good work. We are made in His image; therefore, there are times we too need to spend time by ourselves to pray, rest, and recharge. This is not shameful or lazy in the least! It is being respectful of our bodies, where His Holy Spirit resides. Let’s stop listening to the lies the world paints as truths. Let’s start diving more into His word for actual truth. Let’s live a life worthy of the one we’ve been called to!

Transparent Part 3

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Transparent Part 3

Where do you place your worth?

Here is what the world tells you about worth: He who dies with the most toys, wins. Go big or go home. Buy this and it will make you happy, healthy, better, irresistible. You must look, sound, act this way so you will be liked. Followers equals friends. The list endlessly continues…

If you believe these “worldly wisdoms,” you will never reach the tranquility that is transparency because you will never be or have “enough.” Period. There will always be someone with more. There will always be a count or measure of worth in which the numbers never end and you will never reach.

Now, here is what the Bible says about your worth:

“Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?” (Matthew 6:26 NIV).

Need it in modern-day language? Here you go…

“If you decide for God, living a life of God-worship, it follows that you don’t fuss about what’s on the table at mealtimes or whether the clothes in your closet are in fashion. There is far more to your life than the food you put in your stomach, more to your outer appearance than the clothes you hang on your body. Look at the birds, free and unfettered, not tied down to a job description, careless in the care of God. And you count far more to him than birds” (Matthew 6:25-26 MSG).

Careless in the care of God. Can you imagine? Being loved and cared for completely, transparently, gracefully, and generously…my sweet friend, that’s EXACTLY where you are right now! The problem is, even for Christians, while we may know this, we do not live like this. We do not allow it to permeate our thoughts, words, actions. We do not place our worth in the care of God. Instead, we let the world wield it’s way within the confines of our hearts and minds, causing us shame. We think we don’t have “enough” and therefore will never be enough. We cover our shame and insecurity masquerading around, looking for the Jones’, attempting to keep up with an ever moving target. How utterly ridiculous is that? What kind of life is that?

When you consider that all the hairs on your head are know and created by God (Luke 12:7), when you realize you were purposefully placed in this exact time and space (Romans 9:717), when you accept the fact that you are very good (Genesis 1:31), then transparency becomes much easier because your worth is in His hands. If we were to measure ourselves using God’s grace, we would realize we are more precious than gold. We could stop the pretenses since there would be no need for them. We could actually be transparent. Clear, without obstruction, permeable, frank.

“Nothing in all the world can be hidden from God. Everything is clear and lies open before him.” (Hebrews 4:13 ICB).

Do not be afraid of transparency, my friend. It’s healthy, cathartic, and grace-filled. When you place your trust in Him, you can rely on whom He sends. This earth will never be perfect but know our God always is just that…the perfecter of all. Transparency is shame-free when your worth is viewed through His lens.

So I ask you, where do you place your worth? Is it yielding the return you are investing? Does it provide you peace? Make you feel adequately loved? Are you able to live carelessly in the care of God? This is what transparency brings…living beyond what the world dictates. I invite you to join me on this journey towards tranquility and all the joy it brings, because you are worth it!

Perfection

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Perfection

December 10, 2019

Have you ever liked the idea of doing something rather than the actual doing? Take Christmas cookies, for example. My college roommate and I have a tradition of getting together, a couple days before Christmas, and baking dozens of cookies in a multitude of variety. I say “we,” but it’s actually me. I do all the baking and she does the pulling, cooling, decorating, and transportation to our “finished” table. Since the arrival of our respective children, the kids have taken over the decorating, as well as the sprinkle/frosting explosion that inevitably happens.

Now don’t get me wrong, I do so enjoy our time together. I look forward to our annual “Cookie Day.” It’s a favored tradition in my family, after all! But if I’m honest, after about the 5th hour of baking, I’m plain exhausted. I look around at the colossal mess that’s taken over my kitchen, and I think, “why can’t we make this simpler?” Every. Year.

As I sit in a doctor’s office writing this while patiently (or not so) waiting for my turn, I begin thinking about the things I still need to do in order to make this day happen, and wonder why I exhaust myself planning, preparing, and making the myriad of treats so I can present the “perfect” plate of cookies? Why do I allow myself to work till I am absolutely worn, only to feel completely drained on the subsequent days of celebration? Why do I choose to keep up the pretense that “I’m fine,” starting on the next batch, when nothing is further from the truth?

The REA/L answer? Vanity. I don’t want anyone to think less of me if their favorite isn’t on that plate. I don’t want my neighbors to wonder why they didn’t receive their goodies this year. And frankly, I don’t want to admit that this Mom is tired of trying to making things “perfect.”

Perfect is a four letter word. It’s actually seven, but you know what I mean. Nothing is “perfect” this side of Heaven. Period. Then why do we debilitate ourselves striving for the impossible? Seriously, what’s the point?

I’m not sure where you are in this season that’s meant to be joyous, but can we agree to stop the madness and be intentional about things that actually matter? Can we commit to being present instead of pretending to be perfect? Can we refrain from getting wrapped up in how things look like and focus more on what’s genuinely important? Our friends and families care more about the giver (that’s US) than any gift they receive. So does our Savior…and since it’s His birth we honor in the coming weeks, doesn’t it just make sense to be obedient in our adoration of Him instead of things? Acknowledge His perfection. Spend time adoring Him. Prepare our hearts for His arrival. More Mary than Martha (see Luke 10: 38-42).

Let’s be intentionally present.

Let’s not lose the gift of today.

Let’s actually be merry this Christmas!

And in the doing, my friend, we will be able to truly rejoice together in all the beautiful things He gives us, not only in this season, but in each day we are afforded.

REAL time

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REAL time

November 7, 2019

White hot tears suddenly welled up, threatening to erupt. I was instantly back there, remembering with vivid clarity. My breath caught in my chest, and I thought, was that whole thing really only two months ago? I blinked. Despite my efforts, a single tear escaped, cascading down the side of my face. A visceral reaction to an inanimate object, something I no longer needed and donated, yet the mere presence of it felt crippling. The crimson cane, leaned up against the wall in a back room, stood there taunting me.

I’m thankful I no longer require its assistance. I’m grateful to have my mobility back. I’m humblessed (that’s humbled and blessed at the same time) God healed me, answering my prayer. While that debilitating period seemed to last a lifetime, it disappeared as quickly as its unwelcomed appearance, eleven months later.

“Don’t let it escape your notice, dear friends, that with the Lord a single day is like a thousand years and a thousand years are like a single day. The Lord isn’t slow to keep his promise, as some think of slowness, but he is patient toward you, not wanting anyone to perish but all to change their hearts and lives” (2 Peter 3:8-9 CEB).

In sharing my experiences with you, being transparent with the hard stuff, allowing vulnerability to show, I pray you feel comfort knowing you are not alone. I pray you realize God isn’t punishing you. I pray your heart will soften and release the urge to wrestle. I pray, wherever you are within your struggle, you will reach out instead of retreat. I pray, my friend, every anxiety about the “what, when, or why” you are experiencing will wash away as you patiently wait for Him.

“The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still” (Exodus 14:14 NIV).

This is Lets’s Get REAL Together at its core. A community that fosters authentic Christ-centered relationships in the restless moments. A mindset, grounded in Christ’s grace. A place where you come whenever you need to hear His truths. A space where our secular lives and spiritual lives join together, solidified into singular existence.

In a society that tries to divide us with labels, we need REAL time. Release Each Anxiety/Lie. I have been there, my friend. It may not look exactly like your struggle, but when I was faced with mine, I actively chose a winning team. I sought The One whose victory had already been declared. I praised Him as He carried me through the storm. I want that for you too! Let’s Get REAL Together!

Perspective

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Perspective

October 23, 2019

We were sitting together, one night, my youngest and me, discussing the happenings of our day. I’d had a rough one and was lamenting all my woes. After listening patiently, this is the wisdom my child imparted: “You know, Mom, I get that you are frustrated things didn’t go the way you wanted, but here’s some perspective. You were still ABLE to TRY, and that is a huge victory! A few months ago, that wouldn’t have been possible…” I sat there dumbfounded. Such wisdom!

In a small group, a friend bravely asked, “Am I the only one who feels they have to justify being a stay at home mom now that my kids are older?” We heard the heaviness with which she spoke. The internal conflict of her heart. “May I offer some encouragement?” I asked. “Yes, please,” she responded. “You, my friend, are a full time health provider for four people.” She looked questioningly at me. “Your youngest, your oldest, your husband, and yourself. And you absolutely should count yourself, because if you didn’t, you wouldn’t be able to care for the others.” Tears streamed down her face. “Thank you,” she mustered. “I needed that perspective.”

In a brief conversation with a new friend, she proclaimed something for me that had been my heart’s desire for a number of years. “I thought of you the other day. The Bible Study chapter we just finished talked about rejoicing when it makes no sense and being more real. That’s a lot like your ministry.” My ministry? I have a ministry? I’ve simply been striving to obediently share…I wouldn’t have claimed “Let’s Get REAL Together” as my ministry, but she saw life of it’s existence from her perspective.

Perspective is defined as “a particular attitude toward or way of regarding something; a point of view.”

If you are editing a photo, you have multiple perspective options…conveniently displayed at the bottom of your screen for choosing. Oh if life were that easy! To be able to simply “select” how you react or regard something in an instant! Or tweak it, just to your liking, by adjusting the brilliance, color, or sharpness. We would become masterful in manufacturing precision-perfect perspectives in any given situation. We would be able to edit out feelings of guilt or inadequacy. We would feel comfortable enough to truly be REAL, release each anxiety/lie, because our perspective would always be “on point.”

My friend, this “magical” editing option IS available to us. If we align our hearts, minds, and words with His truths, then we would have the power to change our perspective, in an instant! It takes diligence, diving into His Word daily. It takes relinquishing what we think we know and seeking His infallible truth about who we are. It takes practiced discipline to take a step back (and sometimes a deep breath) before we latch onto or unleash falsehood. It’s all in the perspective, or lens, in which we view things. His lens is forever filtered by grace, love, and mercy. We need to become more familiar with seeing things through His lens, because it is infinitely sharper and more accurate than Apple’s latest offerings.

Adrian Rogers wrote, “Wisdom is looking at life from God’s point of view.”

Let’s become wise and seek His truth in our perspective.