Tag: Grace

Just in Case

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Just in Case

My dad used to always say, “it’s better to have it and not need it, instead of need it and not have it.” Usually, this was in reference to having a coat, umbrella, or roll of quarters tucked away “just in case.” A version of the old Boy Scout “be prepared” motto. And it has served me well, on many occasions. But there are certain things, events, or circumstances in life that you cannot ever really prepare for…

A loved one suddenly passing.

A debilitating injury.

An auto accident.

Unemployment.

A pandemic.

Loss of self.

2020.

In any of these, even the most prepared Eagle Scout would be left dumbfounded. How do you proceed? What’s the next step? Where do you go from here? Why did this happen? Who will you be if you survive this? (The hardest question of all.)

It isn’t until you are thrown into the unpredictable that you become supernaturally armed with the strength for surviving the unknown…you just don’t realize it until after you actually get through it. Onto the other side. Where the pain has dulled enough for you to truly breath again. Friends, if you find yourself in one of those difficult situations, where no amount of “just in case” planning is helpful, you can always turn to your just in time God.

Now I know what you are thinking, “oh boy, here she goes goes again! I wonder what scripture, what Biblical nugget of wisdom this chick thinks she’s gonna pull out to ‘make it all better.’” I gotta admit, I actually smirked a little as I wrote that…because I’ve been there. I’ve had the same thought. Probably even put on my best earnest face while I listened. But as soon as the advice was presented, it was as if I’d been transported into Charlie Brown’s classroom. All I heard was “wah wah wah wah.”

We usually don’t want scripture OR wisdom in those seemingly most desperate of circumstances. We want Morpheous’ blue pill, returning us back to the way things were, blissfully ignorant. The quick, painless fix. Because if God were truly real, He wouldn’t have allow this to happen (right?). Period. The end.

NOT “God doesn’t give us more than we can handle.” NOT “God turns all things into good.” NOT “God’s plans are always best.” While all of these are absolutely true, NONE of them are helpful when you feel as though you are all alone, drowning in the middle of an ocean during a Cat 5 hurricane.

But here’s the thing, sometimes, in the worst of times, what we really need is God to send someone to just listen. Someone to silently sit with us. Someone to hold our hand. Someone to say “I’m sorry.” Someone to allow us cry, scream, cuss…whatever!

I pray you have that “someone” in your life. And if your arms are burning right now from treading water while trying to think who that “someone” could be, it would be my privilege to be your “just in case” safe place. That’s my Let’s Get REAL Together mission. That’s why God has watched over me through the unfathomable, so I could be here with you today…just in case.

I’m New

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I’m New

When I worked in direct sales, one of the things I would tell my team is the grace given when someone heard the words “I’m new.” It was as if suddenly there was a totally different playing field. A fresh start, if you will. An Etch-A-Sketch moment when everything up to that point gets erased. “I’m new” says a lot to the other person.

You probably don’t have the answers.
You probably haven’t had all the experience.
You probably won’t know the perfect solution.
You are simply “new,” and therefore, afforded a magical pass enabling you to receive heaps of patience, maybe even the tilted head version of “Bless your heart,” with a big ‘ol smile and all the Southern charm that accompanies it.

Guess what…right now, we are ALL “new.”

None of us have experienced COVID 19 before. None of us have a clue when we will receive the “all clear.” None of us know what the fallout will be after it’s ok to return to our “normal lives.” Will anything ever really feel “normal” again? Who knows?! I sure don’t…

But I do know this: one of the BEST parts of the “I’m new” phrase is there isn’t a set timeframe for when you have to relinquish it. You can be “new” for as long as you want, or at least, as long as you feel comfortable saying the phrase. Honestly, there are “new” things that pop up daily we’ve not yet encountered, so it is completely applicable, dare I say accurate, to say we are all “new.” EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. Most of us just don’t want to admit or say it in the out loud.

So in my REAL moment with you today, I give you the phrase “Hello, I’m new.” Wear this badge proudly. You are in good company, because my friend, we are experiencing this newness together. Let’s afford each other an extra portion of grace. Let’s be kind to one another. Let’s walk through this, at our safe social distance, with a fresh perspective, buckets full of patience, and an eagerness to learn how we can be both human AND kind in this uncertain time.

SOS

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SOS

March 30, 2020

SOS/ˌesōˈes/noun

  1. an international code signal of extreme distress, used especially by ships at sea.
  2. an urgent appeal for help.

Did you know these three letters don’t actually stand for anything (according to a Mental Floss article)? But if you see and/or hear “SOS,” you immediately know someone is need of dire assistance. It’s one of those little nuggets that somehow has gotten plugged into our brains, and no one is really certain of the actual origin, it just “is what it is.”

In a time when social distancing is the “norm” (wow, that feels so surreal to type), we are missing out on all kinds of cues. On my jog this morning, I smile and give the neighborly wave to those passing by…sometimes, there’s the quick trite exchange: How are you? Good, you? All good. With all that is going on in the world, it’s hard to show your hand in these brief chats.

I want to hug you, but I can’t.

I want to put my hand on your shoulder and ask, “how are things really going?”

I want to tell you, please pray from my dear friend who suddenly lost his job.

I want you to know I don’t have it all together.

I want us to go back to when things weren’t so uncertain.

I feel like I am in a perpetually looping Rihanna song:

“S.O.S., please someone help me
It’s not healthy for me to feel this
Y.O.U. are making this hard
I can’t take it, see it don’t feel right”

Except this isn’t about being lovesick over a boy, it’s feeling heart wrecked about what this social distancing is doing to my kids who desperately miss their friends (and shockingly going to a physical school). It’s seeing the desperation in my community as news feed after news feed pleads, “where can I find eggs, flour, or paper towels?” It’s hearing the unspoken aching in texting my loved ones outside of our four walls, “love and miss you.”

SOS

I keep feeling an urge to write, but if I’m being real, I’m not sure what I have to offer. I certainly do not have the answers. I don’t want to come across as being a princess on a pedestal, completely oblivious and immune to what’s happening. But what I desperately want to do is help. I am a servant at heart, and serving is one of my love languages. It’s in this vein that I share something that has been bouncing around in my head for a few days now…

It started after seeing a post about “chalk you walk,” offering an encouraging message written or drawn on your driveway. I joked and said, mine would read “spread joy not germs,” followed by #WashYourHands underneath. Over the last week, I kept seeing one of those “Hello my name is” labels in my head that had “I’m new” written in the blank space. This whole experience is “new” for all of us! We ought to be doling out grace by the bucketful right now! Positivity seems to have taken a backseat to fear and divisiveness. It makes me sad, hurts my heart, and makes me want to cry.

SOS. Extreme distress. Urgent appeal for help.

But what if we applied this theory by Wayne Dyer instead?

“Change the way you look at things and the things you look at change.”

What if, when we felt ourselves in extreme distress, in need of urgent help, we hailed a different SOS?

If we dug deep, and found something POSITIVE in our current situation.

If instead of flaring up, we took a breath and offered GRACE.

If we simply chose to count it all JOY, no matter the circumstances.

This simple shift in how we choose to operate would make a monumental change in not just our lives within our own four walls but our communities and beyond (I sounded like Buzz Lightyear for a moment)! While I know thinking must seem a bit naive, I cannot get it out of my head. Our world has been turned upside down by this virus, and there is little we can do about it (other than social distancing and thoroughly washing our hands). However, we can change the way we look at things and how we allow things to impact us. This is a life hack that will serve us well after COVID-19 is a thing of the past!

Spread positivity. Offer grace. Share joy.

We will get through this, friends.

We will get together socially again.

And I pray, when we do, we will all be better human beings.

GOOD

by 4letsgetrealtogether1 Comment on GOOD
GOOD

January 11, 2020

When you think “good,” what comes to mind? Something you enjoy? Something to helpful? Something comforting? Certainly not something difficult, right? How could that be “good?”

I am coming to terms with this concept of “good.” His goodness. Goodness that may not initially feel “good” but is good for me nonetheless. That’s not human nature, though, is it? We want what we want, when we want it, and how we want it. Think about how many ways you can personalize your Whataburger or Starbucks! And if it’s available to us, why shouldn’t we?

“For everything God created is good, and nothing is to be rejected if it is received with thanksgiving,” (1 Timothy 4:4 NIV).

THIS is where we get in trouble. We take bits of scripture and morph them to soot our “needs.” Read the scripture again…go ahead, I’ll wait…

It says “for everything GOD created is good” (emphasis added). It does NOT say everything IS good. It also says to receive with thanksgiving. Gratitude seems to be in short supply these days, especially if we do not think what we receive is “good,” which brings me back to this concept of His goodness.

Personally, I seem to be maneuvering from one unusual situation into another. This can get exhausting and utterly deflating. It’s easy to get swallowed up and wallow in a “what have I done to deserve this” mentality. Or “God must think I’m a real bad ass” mindset. Neither is healthy. Nor could they be further from the truth. I think we need a new framework in which to filter “good.”

God

Ordained

Opportunity

Development

GOOD, in this case, is from Him and should be received with thanksgiving. It may not look or feel like “good” in the moment, but God was never meant to be our servant. El Shaddai (God Almighty), yes. El Roi (God who sees), yes. Yahweh Yireh (God Provides), yes. God the “magic genie in the bottle whom we can beckon in a moment’s notice and have our wish granted,” no. Sounds ridiculous seeing it in print, and yet, that’s exactly how a majority of us expect God to operate. Not only is this not good, it’s completely narcissistic, unrealistic and just plain bad!

So today, as I have no voice and am unable to speak in the literal sense, I am faced with a choice. I can choose to let the devil roam around the playground of my mind and allow him to run amuck with his lies, doubting God’s presence within me…OR, I can, with thanksgiving, identify this moment as GOOD. God Ordained Opportunity Development.

Truth be told, this is hard for my extroverted-self to comprehend, let alone apply, without the ability to vocally communicate in a very populated setting all weekend, but I’m trying. I’m praying for an extra portion of grace. I’m breathing and mentally framing my current frustrating situation, as best I can, as GOOD.

Growth

by 4letsgetrealtogether2 Comments on Growth
Growth

October 30, 2019

Infants are amazing to watch. Their growth with the first year of life is exponential. It seems like overnight, development happens. You can easily see changes as they are honed in and refined. Each day is a beautiful display of enthusiastic growth.

As we mature, growth becomes more difficult to detect. Maybe it’s because we are distracted. Maybe it’s because we are so set in our ways, we no longer hold the desire for growth. Maybe it’s because we the process has become so painfully slow that we honestly don’t recognize it.

Growth is gradual.

Growth takes effort.

Growth requires patience.

Have you thought about what area of your life you’d like to see growth?Where are you focusing your efforts? The screen I am currently staring at certainly won’t “grow” me; however, utilized correctly, it can be a vehicle towards growth. The time I spend, like bills in my wallet, have a direct impact on my growth investment. While the returns may be small and incremental initially, the longer they are deposited, the larger the return. The more I look, inspect what needs to be pruned and trim away where necessary, the more growth potential I see and ultimately experience.

You never know who is attempting to grow…or where…unless you speak up and ask. Your friends and family may not recognize your growth process, unless you are bold in sharing. You will not grow without focused effort, which can easily be derailed. You need to add in outside assistance as you seek to grown. If you don’t have support, or fertilizer, to fuel you forward towards your goal, you may never reach it. Transformational growth doesn’t just “happen.”

So today, I proclaim where I’m stretching and growing. I’m venturing out to learn about the video world, so that I can grow this ministry. This is uncharted territory for me, frankly intimidating, but is absolutely necessary if I am to continue obediently sharing and see real growth. Any divine inspiration started will make an impact. If this is where you are, my friend, I applaud you! I’d love to hear how I may support you. But consider this: how exponential will a divine inspiration realized, brought forth through consistent patient gradual growth, impact His kingdom? I don’t know…but I am child-like in my excitement to this process towards fruition.

Be bold with me! Share what are you working towards for the growth of others. It’s an incredible experience!

Help

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Help

October 8, 2019

In grade school, we learned to raise our hand. Speak up. Ask questions. Request help. This such a basic lesson, and yet, one most adults have forgotten. We don’t raise our hand, speak up, ask questions or request help. We are embarrassed. We are prideful. We are stubborn. It seems we’d rather give up, drown, or fail before we did this simple task: raise our hand.

The other side of the coin is raising our hand to offer help. Some do this too frequently. Some rarely do it. Some don’t think they are “qualified” to do it.  Some don’t feel they have the means to do it. Some believe another will do it. Some just flat don’t want to do it.

Whichever side you fall on, the reason we avoid help boils down one thing: doubt. We doubt ourselves. We doubt our ability. We doubt whether or not there’s a real need. We doubt…instead of asking or volunteering. 

Everyone needs help, at one point or another; though we’d rather not admit it. But here’s the thing: we are human. We cannot do it alone. We get caught up in the mind battle of, “why can’t I just…”

Even Moses, the prophet whom God chose to deliver the commandments and lead the Israelites out of Egypt, needed help. When they were fighting the Amalekites, Moses raised up his hands, and the most incredible thing happened: God was there! He sent Moses help in the form of two caregivers (Aaron and Hur).

“As long as Moses held up his hands, the Israelites were winning, but whenever he lowered his hands, the Amalekites were winning. When Moses’ hands grew tired, they took a stone and put it under him and he sat on it. Aaron and Hur held his hands up–one on one side, one on the other–so that his hands remained steady until sunset” (Exodus 17:11-12 NIV).

…and the Israelites won! Moses wasn’t on the “front line” fighting. He stood on a hill, arms raised, silently supporting. When Moses grew tired, Aaron and Hur saw a need and filled it… steadily holding up his hands. You see, we are all puzzle pieces in God’s master plan. We are meant to join and work together. In doing so, we are granted access to a larger picture. When we admit “we can’t,” He sends someone in His stead to help.

“Help each other with your troubles. When you do this, you truly obey the law of Christ” (Galatians 6:2 ICB).

Whether you are the one in need of help or one who feels called to help, raise you hand, my friend. He will use you mightily. He will strengthen you. And maybe, you will no longer doubt you are worthy of His grace.